When Will It Ever End?

Since I’ve been back, I’ve had the distinct feeling my life barely belongs to me any longer.  I know that’s a weird sentiment, but I can’t think of a better way to describe my current situation.  The moment my plane landed at LAX, I felt like my brain was under siege, bombarded with the various duties and responsibilities that lie ahead.  And since that moment, the feeling hasn’t subsided, not one bit.  Living in Australia was like existing in a bubble.  I was able to put most of my life on hold, and only focus on being there.  Australia was my break from reality.  It was my time to be selfish, to explore an exotic land, and forget about the extraneous details of life.  It was my time to just be.  But all good things must come to an end, and that bubble had to burst.  So, here I am, back in the States, facing reality once again, and doing my best to maintain some semblance of sanity.  It isn’t easy.  There are just too many things to do, and even more things too worry about.  I’m still trying to sort out all of my affairs, in regards to living abroad for a year; the amount of paperwork I need to go through is mind-boggling.  Even though I’m working fewer hours, I’m constantly reminded of how draining working nights can be.  And then there is this darn wedding we are trying to plan.  It would be easier if we had a bigger budget, but we don’t, so I’m left to do much of it on my own.  My mind is spinning with all of the details I should be attending to.  I can’t even worry about the honeymoon right now; it just isn’t a priority.  And then there is the annoying fact that we need to move again in a couple of months.  The list just goes on and on.   I keep telling myself this insanity won’t last forever; eventually life will slow down and I will be able to catch my breath.  But, right now, it’s all quite overwhelming.  So, I’m doing my best to take things one step at a time.  Tonight’s step is to enjoy a glass of red wine while I navigate through my real estate bond paperwork.  After all, if I’m going to spend a Saturday night tackling something so dull, I might as well make it a little fun.